6am...the possibilities

6am comes, the alarm goes off...I hate that sound, I hate that part of the morning. That horrible sound of an alarm clock which might as well be screaming "get the f*ck out of bed". That sound always seems to come way too soon and I always feel like I've just fallen asleep when it goes off....a terrible way to start the day if you ask me!

Personally, I know my day would go much better if I was woken up by soft kisses on the back of my neck and a soft whisper in my ear saying "its time to wake up beautiful".

Maybe then I would sleep better at night. Maybe then I would look forward to that 6am wake up call. I would get into bed, close my eyes as quickly as I could and fall asleep with a smile of anticipation on my face...instead, I lay in bed surrounded by a million thoughts, questions, doubts and everything in between that keep my mind occupied and unable to rest...perhaps its just because I really, really don't want to hear that sound...that sound of the horrible screaming alarm clock at 6am! I curse you alarm clock, I curse you!!

Off to wait for it again...*sighs*

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Its finally over!

So we did it, we made it through yet another Christmas! I really thought yesterday was going to be an awful and hard day for me without my kids but I have to say...all in all, I had an excellent Christmas.

We woke up around 9 and started to open presents. After that dad and brother 2 started to make Christmas breakfast while brother 1 and I went to timmies. By the time we got back breakfast was just about ready, this was the first time we'd had breakfast together since last Christmas. Breakfast was great, dinner was great and then off to an amazing friends house for holiday fun! I see my girl only a few times a year but a friendship like ours can stretch between visits. Its nice to have a friend in your life that always knows just what to say and always knows what you need...I love you girl, thanks for making yesterday such a great day! On top of that...it was also really nice to see an old friend. What made the night complete was watching a father with his son on Christmas night, playing together, laughing and smiling.

Merry Christmas to all of my family and friends, I hope this year was an amazing year and that Santa was good to all of you!



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Christmas...

Its Christmas eve, I should be hanging stockings and putting out cookies and milk for Santa. Instead...I'm sitting here trying to get into the Christmas spirit. I still have presents to wrap, I haven't even started and really can't be bothered. Christmas morning will come and there will be no sounds of childrens laughter, no sounds of toys running across the floor and no sounds of happiness. Its going to be a quiet morning without my kids here tomorrow, I'm not sure how I'm even going to get out of bed never mind put on a Santa hat and be merry.
Please let Christmas pass quickly this year, I'm almost out of kleenex...
With that said...I apologize in advance for not being myself this holiday season.
Wishing you and yours a very merry christmas and all the best in the new year, lets hope this one will be better =)
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Intimacy

Intimacy is a four-syllable word for, “Here are my heart and soul. Please grind them into hamburger and enjoy.”

It’s both desired, and feared, difficult to live with… and impossible to live without.

Intimacy also comes attached to life’s three R’s: Relatives, Romance, and Roommates. There are some things you can’t escape, and other things, you just don’t want to know…

I wish there were a rule book for intimacy. Some kind of a guide that could tell you when you’ve crossed the line. It would be nice if you could see it coming. And I don’t know how you fit it on a map…

You take it where you can get it, and keep it as long as you can. And as for rules… Maybe there are none. Maybe the rules of intimacy are something you have to define for yourself.

I think Meredith Grey covered intimacy perfectly in this monologue from Grey's Anatomy Season 1 - episode 4. I was going to use it as a starting point for today's entry and build on it...what's left to say though?

Intimacy - If you have it, hold on to it and if you don't...keep your chin up, it'll find you sooner than you think!

My wish list for "Santa"

Today I announced that I was starting a blog, I then asked for ideas on what to write about...One of the suggestions I got was a "creative" wish list for Santa! This isn't just any ordinary wish list...expect the unexpected =)

I want...

• To be loved unconditionally
• A shopping spree at Ikea
• A box of hairdye that applies itself when needed
• Handcuffs, fuzzy...but not too fuzzy or it looses the effect of them
• A Koala
• Some of Tinkerbell's Pixie Dust
• An endless supply of cuddles
• The biggest bottle of Tequila there is
• Happiness
  
• To see smiles on my children's faces
• My brothers to meet the women of their dreams and start a family
• My parents to be happy with life as well as themselves
  
• To be kissed on the forehead
• Someone to tell me that they never want to let me go
• My own warehouse full of shoes
• The biggest, most comfy pillows around
• A man in my bed to cuddle with on those restless nights
• The Twilight books...with Edward to read them to me
  

The making of a blog

So everyone seems to be big on this "blog" posting thing...I thought I'd give it a shot, so here goes nothing! I really have no idea what I intend to write about -

• My life
• My kids
• Daily rantings
• Love and Romance
• Some poetry
• Pics that make me laugh my ass off

All in all...my blog will be nothing more than a bit of insight into me and my world =)